Dear Reader,
The gradual loss of what defines us—the habits and actions that make us “us”—directly attacks our being and identity. This erosion can stem from a lack of time, constant stress, social pressure, the inability to develop good habits, lack of “productive leisure” such as engaging in hobbies, spending time with loved ones, or pursuing personal interests, or a sense of guilt.
Our sense of self represents everything that motivates us, drives us, spurs us on, and keeps us on the right path. In moments of uncertainty, we can say, “I am a person who does/does not do X, so I know how to act.” If we lose this, we lose everything.
“It was my integrity that was important. Is that so selfish? It sells for so little, but it’s all we have left in this place. It is the very last inch of us, but within that inch we are free.”
Alan Moore – V for Vendetta
During uncertain times, instead of referring to our internal compass, we might turn to what seems most “appropriate” or “aligned” at the moment, rather than what is intimately correct and will lead us down the best path. This course of action will result in repeated mistakes and continuous frustrations until we doubt what we are and whether we can be something different and better.
In the absence of other elements to define us, our failures will take on a new guise and shape our identity. When we find ourselves in such a situation, it is crucial to break the vicious cycle. We might need a shock. Which one? I will leave that as an exercise for the Reader; it is a matter too personal to generalise.
Until next time, remember to reconnect with your true self, reinforce your core habits, and trust your internal compass by whatever means it takes. This conscious effort can be the shock needed to break the cycle and help you regain your sense of identity and purpose.
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